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[Logo] Long Rally-Related Quotes,
Poems, and Song Lyrics

Here's a collection of rally-related quotes, poems, and song lyrics. Many are from the Road Rally Handbook.
Small wheel turn by the firing rod,
big wheel turn by the grace of God
every time that wheel go round
bound to cover just a little more ground

-- Robert Hunter, (Grateful Dead) 1972

Louis drives a beat up '69 Dart,
swears it's the statue of Mary
keeps the car from falling apart

-- Billy Falcon, 1991

Heaven is where the rallymaster is British,
the checkpoint workers Swiss,
the hospitality done by the French,
the service crews German,
and the local law enforcement Italians.

Hell is where the rallymaster is German,
the checkpoint workers Italian,
the hospitality done by the British,
the service crews French,
and the local law enforcement Swiss.

This embarrasing, politically incorrect blurb
appeared on a checkpoint slip
during the 1991 Nutmeg III rally.
Author Unknown.

Some like trips in luxury ships
and some in railroad wagons
and others swear by the upper air
and the wings of flying dragons

Let each make haste to indulge his taste
be it beer, champagne, or cider.
My private joy, both man and boy,
is being a rally car driver

-- Ogden Nash, 1902-1971 with "poetic license" taken by Clint Goss

Driver: the fellow who, with hands firmly planted on the steering wheel, foot on the accelerator, one eye on the road, one eye on his odometer, and one eye on the route instructions, grinds his molars in anguish and wonders when (Oh, When!) his partner will finish calculating and announce the next minute's reading.

-- Gene Hammond, from The Sports Car Rally Handbook, 1962

The wheel is turning and you can't slow down
You can't let go and you can't hold on
You can't go back and you can't stand still
If the thunder don't get you then the lightning will

Won't you try just a little bit harder
Couldn't you try just a little bit more
Little bit harder, just a little bit more
Little bit further than you've gone before

-- Robert Hunter, (Grateful Dead) 1972

Well it's a strange old game - you learn it slow
One step forward and it's back to go
Standing on the throttle, standing on the brakes
In the groove till you make a mistake

Sometimes you are the windscreen
Sometimes you are the bug
Sometimes it all comes together
Sometimes you're gonna loose it all

-- Mark Knopfler, (Dire Straits), 1991

Winding in and winding out
Leaves a lot of serious doubt
If the lout who built this route
Was going to hell or coming out

-- Author Unknown

Remember days when rallies
were simple and serene
You had a chance to cruise along
and dig the local scene

But a sliderule and a stopwatch
would make it for the worst
And the guy who failed in grammar school
could maybe finish first

When directions were in English
and computing was a joke
When your wife could navigate the course
and still have time to smoke

Those days are gone forever
its a nightmare not a dream
Instructions for the rally teams
would make an Einstein scream

For the pros are running rallies
and to make it all worthwhile
They calculate the distances
in the millionths of a mile

You think that you have got it made
when you're three seconds late
You find that you are 30th
in a field of 28

There's a Halda on your dashboard
a Blackwell in the door
Minervas on the clipboard
and a Curta on the floor

Your wife no longer rides with you
you kept her out by force
It doesn't build togetherness
but it helps prevent divorce

Now your present navigator
is a real live Ph.D.
He teaches Calculus and stuff
at a school called MIT

But even he can't beat the game
you're still lost in the pack
You'd better kick him out
and get a Univac

-- The Rally Song, Oscar Brand, 1962

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